A Very Special Mother's Day Message
A Very Special Mother's Day Message is a Mother's Day PSA of Red vs. Blue. Characters Red Team *Sarge *Grif *Simmons *Donut Blue Team *Tucker *Caboose Synopsis Unhelpful viewers tips are given on what to buy mothers for Mother's Day, beginning with a display of what could go wrong, where Grif has bought his mother, roleplayed by Simmons, a series of gifts the latter despises. A scene is then shown in which Caboose, as the son, has made Donut, as his mother, a coffee mug which has already been broken and left elsewhere and all his money has been spent on Yu-Gi-Oh cards instead of a gift. Satisfied with the performances, Sarge then suggests an assortment of possible gifts using a scrolling list which moves too quickly to be read. Transcript Fade in to Tucker and Sarge standing next to each other. Sarge: 'Well hello. I'm Sarge from the popular webseries Red Vs. Blue. '''Tucker: '''And I'm Private Tucker. '''Sarge: '''We're here to talk to you about a very special event happening this weekend for many women. Maybe even one you know. '''Tucker: '''That's right. This Saturday is Ladies' Night at the Rusty Nail and Screw! '''Sarge: '''Ahruh, actually Tucker, I was talking about Mother's Day. '''Tucker: '''What? Oh. Dammit! '''Sarge: '''Ya know, a lot of kids out there are probably wondering what to get their Ma on this special day. '''Tucker: '''Not me. She was a dirty tramp. '''Sarge: '''That explains a lot. '''Tucker: '''Finding the right gift for your Mom can sometimes be difficult. '''Sarge: '''When giving a gift on Mother's Day, try to remember that your ma is a unique and special person. '''Tucker: '''Whore. '''Sarge: '''That can mean that going the safe route, might not always be so safe. '''Tucker: '''Why whatever do you mean, Sarge? '''Sarge: '''Let's take a look at an example. Grif and Simmons have politely agreed to help us demonstrate by performing a little skit. ''Screen shifts over to Grif and Simmons. 'Grif: '''I don't wanna do this! '''Simmons: '''What're you complaining about? You got the easy part. I'm the one wearing pantyhose under my armor because Sarge believes in Method Acting. '''Sarge: '''Don't you two make me come over there! Now get to demonstratin'! '''Grif: '(sigh) Mother. I love you because you violently squeezed me out of your womb. Grif then holds up a bouquet of flowers. 'Grif: '''Here are some flowers I bought for you at a flower place. Happy official day for mothers. '''Simmons: '''Worthless daughter. How could you be so thoughtless? You know I am allergic to flowers. Also you're adopted and I never loved you. I will now send you to live in shame, with a robot foster family. ''Screen tilts over slightly to show Church and Sheila. 'Sarge: '''Whoa, Nelly! That didn't go very well at all. '''Tucker: '''Flowers seem like the perfect gift because they are pretty and boring, like most women, but that plan sure backfired. '''Sarge: '''Now let's take a look at what happens when you go to a little extra effort. '''Tucker: '''Take it away, Donut and Caboose! ''Camera moves over to Donut and Caboose. 'Donut: '''Hello son, how are you. '''Caboose: '''Sheila!? I mean mother? Because it is Mother's Day and I love you so, I made you a very ugly coffee mug in shop class today. '''Donut: '''Oh, thank you my son, where is it? '''Caboose: '''I left it at school. Also, it is broken. '''Donut: '''Thank you my child, you always think of the perfect thing to do for me. '''Caboose: '''I spent my allowance on Yu-Gi-Oh trading cards, and meat flavored bubble gum. '''Donut: '''My angel. ''Back to Sarge. 'Sarge: '(entering from the right) Aaand scene. So now you see how the personal touch, is what really makes all the difference when selecting a Mother's Day gift. 'Tucker: '''What? That last skit didn't make any sense whatsoever! '''Sarge: '''Exactly! '''Tucker: '''This is retarded, I'm leaving. ''Tucker then leaves. 'Sarge: '''Remember kids, you only have one mother. Unless you come from a progressive home like Donut's. So be good to her on Mother's Day. And now, for those of you who still don't have any good gift ideas, here's a list of Sarge-approved items you might want to consider. ''Sarge turns to the side to watch his list scroll by extraordinarily quickly. '' '''Sarge: '''Happy Mother's Day. ''Cut to black. '''Donut: ''(voice)' '''Hey wait a minute! It's over already!? I didn't even get a chance to breast-feed anyone! Oh man, my nipples are already lactating! Sarge's Gift Ideas Sarge supplies a list of gift ideas for Mother's day. All of them are repeated twice. Seen only for a second, here is the full listing: *Extra-bendy Cactus * Exotic Flightless Bird * Undercarriage Washer * Dispenser of Goodies * Yoga-tizing Spatula * Mutant Goblin * Argentine Man-Servant * Space Goo (or similar) * Fractal Misnomer * Rhinoplasty * Donkeyplasty * Nastyplasty * Old Shoe Horn * Old Horn * New Shoe * Smaller Crawdads * Sandbox (with box) * Transparent Ding-Gong * Articulated Thing * Round One (or likewise) * Extras * Candy with Tips * Somambulent Honkie * Misguided Dobo * Banjo Spaceship * Parachutes and Fishes * Tu Blave * Macchu Picchu * Most Postacio * Mustafa Portencio * Claven (sans nuts) * Sharks, all types * Wind Samples * Mutton * Extraordinary Slorf * Fineries Video Category:PSAs Category:Episodes